{"id":85,"date":"2020-01-01T21:50:07","date_gmt":"2020-01-01T21:50:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/?p=85"},"modified":"2020-01-02T03:53:45","modified_gmt":"2020-01-02T03:53:45","slug":"2020-day-1-or-rather-day-5","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/?p=85","title":{"rendered":"2020, Day 1. Or rather… Day .5"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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I went running with my #runnerslife friends today, and it was tough. BUT, I did it. And during a certain stretch, I remember thinking to myself, “If I weren’t already strong, I would’ve quit 5 times by now,” That is, mentally strong. Cuz sure, physically it was tough cuz I’ve been slacking off lately. But it was even more mentally tough, cuz lately I just don’t want to do anything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I realized though – there is ONE thing I really really REALLY don’t want to do, and that is: quit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You see, all of this “Seasonal Affective” would be WAY worse if I did quit: that is, if I fighting it completely and really let myself fall into it. I’ve been leaning into it just a bit, taking the “time off” and letting myself check out – but only just a bit. If I really quit fighting it, I’d have gone off the deep end weeks ago. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But I won’t. Not this time… and not the other times either.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This isn’t the first time I’ve found myself on the brink. It’s just the first time I’ve talked about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Every time, I realize there’s a voice, a voice way down deep, screaming at the top of her lungs: “DON’T! Don’t you dare give up, don’t you dare give in, this is NOT. YOU.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And she’s right.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So… here we go. Tomorrow is MY Day 1 of 2020. Time to get back in the saddle, and get back to being me. I don’t pretend it’ll be easy, cuz I know it wont. I’ve got some hella detoxing to do. BUT… I also DO know how amazing it feels to feel badass, and I’m ready to get back to THAT \ud83d\ude01<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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I went running with my #runnerslife friends today, and it was tough. BUT, I did it. And during a certain stretch, I remember thinking to myself, “If I weren’t already strong, I would’ve quit 5 times by now,” That is, mentally strong. Cuz sure, physically it was tough cuz I’ve been slacking off lately. But … <\/p>\n

Continue reading “2020, Day 1. Or rather… Day .5”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/85"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=85"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/85\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":88,"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/85\/revisions\/88"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=85"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=85"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/mammaber.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=85"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}